Negative Positivity

Words are so incredibly powerful. I've spent so many hours stewing over words said to me or words that I have said. When it comes to sins of the tongue, I am certainly among the worst offenders. God's been teaching me a lot about it and I wanted to share. Especially, because tonight, I was sucked back into valuing words more than God. It was a deja vu moment back to high school. It was a brief ten minutes, but it was as if the work that God has done on my heart the past two years were pushed out of my ears as new words entered them. Negative ones. It was silly, really, that I should be upset. I mean, I hardly know the person and it was said jokingly, but it still hurt. After about ten minutes of stewing and wondering and feeling once again insecure about myself, I realized something. I do this to people. I might not be bluntly negative about their appearance, but I do it. I hurt people with my words and it's not intended.

I'm sure you've probably heard a thousand sermons on "taming the tongue" based off of James 3 I know that I have, but I know that I've failed to grasp it. I also realized that positive words can be just as damaging as negative. I'm not talking the "oh, I like your shirt!" when actually you hate it positivity. I'm talking the making promises and not keeping it; or the classic use of the word "when". It wasn't until the past 2 years that I realized just how painful broken promises are. I didn't realize that using the word "when" about the future essentially cuts God out of the equation. These are things that I had never even considered. James 3:5 says, "So too, though the tongue is a small part of the body, it boasts great things. Consider how large a forest a small fire ignites". Although forest fires have a negative connotation, it doesn't specify whether the great things that the tongue boasts in are good or bad. It's something that I've definitely been convicted of lately. I'm not a negative person by nature, but I am a positive person and a planner. This has led to me dealing with a lot of making promises that I can't keep, because I don't want to say no to anyone, and getting ahead of God in my plans. I'll say "when" and count on something that I haven't prayed about or consulted God on at all. I've been challenged to live in the moment and to trust a steadfast God with my unstable future. It's really really rough, but so good. Your relationship with God becomes stronger and you make more memories this way. God can do immeasurably more than we could ever ask or imagine, if we would just stop planning ahead of him and trust Him.

Negativity is obviously a huge thing when it comes to taming our tongues. Nothing spreads as fast as a bad rumor about someone. It's annoying. Something I've been really trying to work on and something I think there needs to be more focus on is negatively joking. We don't ever really know someone's deepest insecurities or hurts. We don't know how damaging our "joke" may be. Sarcasm and teasing may all seem in good fun to someone, but in reality, it can cut deep. I've been both the victim and the attacker in this situation. Girls are especially sensitive and so these jokes can hurt more than we know, but it also can affect guys. They just aren't as vocal as girls with their emotions.
The thing with negativity is that it also insults the creation of God. Ladies, God thinks you are stunning. He thinks you are a total babe. It's silly that we allow words to wreck our hearts when the King of Kings created us and loves us. On the days when I let the negativity in, I feel like He must look down at me and just shake his head in sadness. His heart aches for us to understand that there will be negativity, but that does not lessen our value to Him. He adores us. He cherishes us. He died for us. Negativity seems silly when it's placed next to that radical love. The more we get to know Him and the love that He has for us, the more our words become about Him and His story. Our hearts will want to more and more share His message of Scandalous Grace and Radical Love. We are Daughters of the King, let's start speaking like it.